Sex is one of the most enjoyable parts of the human experience, but when personal or societal factors are constantly conspiring against you, it can be far from it. The amount of emotions that we experience when making love to a new partner can sometimes be too much for our bodies to handle.
The first time nerves, sheer excitement and the unwavering desire to impress your lucky partner can result in sexual performance anxiety, a very normal condition experienced by men of all ages.
If you’ve had enough and want to get your love life back on track, it’s important to understand why you might be suffering from sexual performance anxiety and get some tips to combat it.
Why We Get Anxious Before Sex
When we talk about sexual performance anxiety, more often than not, we’re talking about erectile dysfunction. When we are getting ready to jump into bed with our sexual partner, negative emotions are already bubbling up. Most commonly, experiencing anxiety or stress about impressing your partner sexually or performing well can start you off on a negative downward spiral.
When these emotions become too much and we experience erectile dysfunction or perform badly with a new partner, we can often feel like a failure and struggle to build up the courage to try again. While it’s easy to dwell on these emotions, it only stands to reinforce the anxiety and erectile dysfunction and can even lead to more severe conditions such as depression in rare cases.
There are many other factors that can lead to sexual performance anxiety:
- Continuing issues in your relationship
- Worry that you won’t perform well and will disappoint your partner sexually
- Being uncomfortable in your own skin can drastically increase stress by having to be naked in front of someone new
- Concern over the size of your penis
- Worry that you might ejaculate too early, too late, or not at all.
All of these thoughts can lead to your body releasing the stress hormones, epinephrine and norepinephrine, constricting your blood vessels making it harder for you to get erect.
How to Overcome Your Sexual Performance Anxiety
You’ll be pleased to hear that having confident, pleasurable sex to your heart’s content is a real possibility. In most cases, overcoming sexual performance and anxiety and erectile dysfunction can be achieved with some personal changes to your mindset and habits.
However, if you find that nothing is working it is a good idea to see a doctor. They will ask about sexual history and may suggest you see a therapist to prescribe medication.
Slow down: Breath, this isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon. Take your time with foreplay and focus on your partner’s sexual pleasure rather than whether your penis is erect or not.
Share your feelings: Talk to your partner about your anxiety and the stress you have coming into the bedroom. It sounds cliche, but just being open with your partner can go a long way to relieving your anxiety. If you don’t feel comfortable sharing these feelings with your partner for fear of being judged, then maybe they are not compatible as a sexual partner.
Focus on your senses: During sex, try and focus on the sensory experience instead of worrying about every small detail. What are your hands feeling? What are your eyes seeing? Focusing on these feelings can help block negative thoughts. Using props like music and candles can enhance the senses and distract you from the voice inside your head.
Erectile dysfunction treatments: For many men, the main cause of sexual performance anxiety stems from a reinforced worry that they won’t be able to get an erection. Take this worry away, and the overall stress and anxiety about general sexual performance go away.
ManGo offers a great selection of industry-leading, medically approved erectile dysfunction treatments designed to make getting erections easier. The active Viagra ingredient, Sildenafil, is a medically approved ED treatment that is clinically proven to effectively make erections easier by increasing blood flow to the penis. We offer Sildenafil, Tadalafil, Viagra and Cialis to purchase either on a subscription basis or one-off purchase in a variety of different pack sizes.